An Awesome Thing Happened On The Way To The Yankees Game...

Okay, how do I explain this? I'll start from the beginning. My sister hooked me and Machine up with tickets to the Yankees game. We had good seats and everything and we were on the train, on our way.

This girl got on and asked if it was the train to Yankee stadium and we said yes, that's where we're going, how funny. She sat next to us and we got to talking and as it turned out, she works for the Yankees.

Her job is VIP seating.

She asked me for my number when we got off the train and told us that if she could change our seats she would text me. I thought nothing of it and we sat down.


We sat here. See? Good seats. Suddenly I get a phone call from a man named "Ryan" who tells us he's Jen's boyfriend and that they're coming to get us.

This is Jen and Ryan.


Jen and Ryan take us into a private box with unlimited free food and drinks (and of course, a private bathroom). ULTIMATE SCORE!!






Needless to say, we had the best time ever. Sorry to all you REAL Yankees fans who like, actually watch games and whatnot.

Today's Special

I'm obsessed with these little cupcakes. They're come in egg cartons and each one has a special candy surprise inside. Sometimes it's a marshmallow, sometimes it's a peanut, sometimes it's a gummy bear, a snowflake, Junior Mint... you get the idea.

They also make birthday cakes that look like Raggedy Ann.

OBSESSED.

Reading Lists

Okay, so I actually did a reading list a long time ago with Amy Kellner for Vice, but since I just finished an amazing book that was NOT on that reading list (Middlesex) I will make a new one. There might be some repeats, I'm not the most well-read person or anything. I'm not gonna make this a super mega reading list, just a lite one for this ever so fucking boring month of August.

Here goes it:

1. Middlesex:(obviously)
2. His Dark Materials Trilogy:Pretend "The Golden Compass" movie never happened and read these three books. You're brain will be blown apart into little pieces that travel through time and space and then come back into your brain and hug you.
3. The Time Traveler's Wife: Also forget about the movie (although I'll probably see it, shh). This is a beautifully crafted novel, totally give props to the author for pulling this book off. I loved it.
4. Revolutionary Road: This movie was a bore because the author basically wrote a poem about suburbia in the 50's and people can't make movies out of poetry.
5. The Road: Some people say this book is boring but I couldn't put it down. I like books about the apocalypse and besides, it's super short so whatever.
6. The Pilot's Wife: This book was kinda fucked up and I couldn't put it down but I didn't love it or anything.
7. Live From New York: This book is about the history of SNL and I thought it was awesome and it's super big so that's a plus.

Books I Am Going To Read Next:
2 Gay Talese books I took out of the library
Blood Meridian
The Fortress of Solitude
Get Happy: Bio of Judy Garland
American Pastoral

Please give me warnings and/or recommendations.

Middlesex

"...Living sends a person not into the future but back into the past, to childhood and before birth, finally, to commune with the dead. You get older, you puff on stairs, you enter the body of your father. From there it's only a quick jump to your grandparents, and the before you know it, you're time-traveling. In this life we grow backwards."

Where I'm At

I don't want to say I feel "depressed" because that's a huge word, right? It seems so definite and diagnostic. I don't even know if depressed is the right word anyway. It's not like I can't get out of bed. It's not like I don't want to do stuff.

I guess I feel angry, like it should be easier for me to get a job. It should be easier for me to think up awesome ideas and write them and wow I've had so much practice in this area you'd think it would just be second nature by now.

It's not. The blue crystals are pointed towards my writing hands. The deep focus potions are lit by tea candles day after day in my little witchcraft area. The prayers are done on the knees, the meditations are done in the morning. I have meetings, shrink, friends, boyfriend, agents, managers, people who don't know me asking to be my friend on facebook...

I don't know what to write about anymore is how I feel. I don't even know what my ideas are and when they come, I can't tell if they're good. I can't even tell if I believe in the concept "ideas" and I can't tell if I just hated myself a little bit for writing the "concept of ideas" (what does that even mean?).

If I'm Disneyland, and everything I have to offer is a souvenir, well then, I'm fucked. Going out of business. A ghost town carnival where the rides don't work anymore and the Sharks and the Jets are using me for their turf war.

It's not even about giving up anymore because I can't even remember what I'd be giving up exactly. There was a time where I felt like I knew exactly what the next right thing to do was.

That is not this time. I have no fucking clue.

Matisse Turns...Something

It was Matisse's bday on August 1st. She turned twompers two. We went to her art show at the Lola gallery and then to her bonfire beach party.







MOXIE BREAK!!!




This is what happened at night:


Fat Jew aka the male model

Moo had to air out his feet from all the wet sand. I liked it.

I miss it out there. Let's go back soon?

I Had An Awesome Weekend

I went to Southampton with Moo and his crew. It was awesome.



Dana let like, a million of us stay at her beautiful house. She's basically a saint.

We swam and played tennis and ate sushi and burgers and LOLed til the sun came up (well, I went to sleep before then but you know what I mean).






And this was all just one day. More soon.