The OldShapes

I forgot to mention that I'm part of a DJ team now. We're called The OldShapes. We do all kinds of corporate events and Bar Mitzvah's.


Stretch marks are the new bangs, and wrinkles are the new black. For inquiries please email me at lesley@viceland.com

Click Here for the first ever OldShapes interview.

East Coast Fall

I djed the RX Art Ball, which was a classy event albeit slightly boring. Luckily, these chairs were really small.


After I went to J.Penry's house in Brooklyn, where the grapes are ripe for plucking. They grow in his backyard and we got to eat them right off the vine. How cool?

Fall is such fun. We had the annual pumpkin carving at my boyfriend's apartment in Greenpoint.




If you look closely, you can see that my pumpkin is barfing (lower left corner). It's titled "Sharky Favorite, Tomorrow Morning."

looks like we made it

Hotel of Horrors

On the way to Stroudsburg we passed this really creepy old house that had a sign that said "Hotel of Horrors 7-11pm. Be There or Be Scared." Actually, I made that last part up. But the "hotel" was fucking crazy looking so we knew we had to go.

It cost $15 to get in (that's like a million dollars in New York money) and we waited on line for an hour and a fucking half. By the time it was our turn, we were so broken down and tired that we were just like, "Alright ghosts, scare us. We dare you." Little did we know...

This photo was taken 5 seconds after we were chased out of the house by a man with a pig mask and a chain-saw. This photo is NOT exaggerated! It was the scariest experience of my life. 5 floors, 27 rooms, each room more insane than the next. I would describe to what my favorite rooms were like but I really don't want to ruin it. Now that I think about it,I'm pretty sure I've already said too much. I'll describe to you what my favorite room was like but if you think you're gonna go, skip over this part.

*WARNING: SPOILER AHEAD*

My favorite and scariest room by far was just your typical pitch black room. We were just standing there not knowing what to do when suddenly a bright, bright light would flash on for about 10 seconds. We saw we were in a padded room, and the lights went off. When they went on again a man all dressed in white with a paper mache white mask was hovering around us, like right fucking next to us. Then, the lights went off again. We didn't know how to get out. I've never laughed and screamed so hard simultaneously before. I couldn't breathe. It was so funny. Andy and Scott were sweating and screaming. Just thinking about it is making me laugh.

The only thing missing from the Hotel of Horrors was a midget talking backwards and BOB standing behind a dresser trying to steal Laura Palmer's diary. Please try to go to this, it was SO worth it. I'm going every year. Make sure you get there early though.
www.myspace/hotelofhorror.com
Saylorburg, PA
If you decide to go, call me!

I went to Pennsylvania part 1

I went away this past weekend with Scott, Judi, and Andy. We went to PA to go antique flea marketing, etc. First rule of road trip: no showers allowed.

We didn't know this would happen!

Xavier Roberts is such a great butt tattoo idea. Has anyone done that? Steve-O or something?

We thought this blonde Frankstein looked a lot like Andy. They were even standing the same exact way, weird!!

We got lost in Lehighton which was a city for lost souls and other kinds of crackheads. This sign was worth the alternate route.


There's way more to come. I went to the most insane haunted house I've ever been to in my life, I'm gonna dedicate a whole page to it.

Thank you Christine Blystone from Portland

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Jaws

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Rocky Road Shortbread

3. YOUR "FLY Guy/Girl" NAME: (first initial of first name, first three
letters of your last name),
L-Arf

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal),
Red Kitten

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Ericha Queens

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first
2 letters of your first),
Arfle

7. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The" + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink),
The Black Grapefruit Juice

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers),
Al Harold

9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent,
favorite candy),
Hermes Starburst

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's & father's middle names ),
Anne Sigmund

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher's last name, a
major city that starts with the same letter)
Engel Ellenville

12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower).
Halloween Baby's Breath

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you're wearing
right now + "ie" or "y")
Blackberry Jeansie

14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree),
Oatmeal Redwood

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: ("The" + Your fave hobby/craft, fave
weather element + "Tour"),
The Karaoke Clouds Tour

Come

Come to the Art Ball. Buy tickets, it's a benefit. I'm djing with Gavin McInnes. Wear a fancy outfit.


Fancy!

this

I haven't updated in a while because I haven't been doing anything interesting. In fact, the only time I ever really blog is when I should be doing something else. Usually something more important that pays and will benefit my future. Oh well. The worlds biggest dog happened. It tried to bite me! Aww.
I got to train a new employee...And I got to hang with these kooky kids:





In other news, Sophie can walk now! The doctors said it would take a year and well, it's nothing short of a miracle. I mean, the odds weren't really against her but still, we are all so proud.

Evil

A Daemon is the shape your soul would take if it were an animal. Sound kooky? Try reading The Golden Compass before the movie comes out wise-guy.

What Animal Would Your Daemon Settle As?

Your MONKEY DAEMON represents a nature that is admired, detail-oriented, and full of curiosity. Some people might call you self-absorbed. You like to plan ahead, and hone your various talents to perfection.
Take this quiz!








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Friend Quiz #2

This is a friend quiz I did with my friend Michael. We met in late May/early June and have become good friends very, very quickly. The photo of him is a self portrait he drew of himself. He's a really good draw-er.

1. What is your favorite outfit?

My grey shacket. It's half a shirt and half a jacket.
You can button it or zip it up. A v-neck Fruit of the
Loom white t-shirt. Blue jeans. White Adidas shell
tops.

2. What character from a movie gives you a semi. Not
a porn. Is there a specific scene?

Mario Bello in "A History Of Violence". She's wearing
her h.s. cheerleader uniform and they do it on the
staircase.

3. Who do you have a crush on?

Man: John Mayer; Woman: Soledad O'Brien (CNN)


4. What are you currently obsessed with?

Online Scrabble (Scrabulous.com); MLB Pennant Race (go
Yanks!); pesto; zombies.


5. Why do you like me?

Cute; funny; smart; cool; nice; fun; fucked up; very
good person.

6. What would you name your kids, if you had any
(provided that you don't have any already that you don't know about).

Boy: Vinny; Girl: Pru(dence)


7. What would you rather, lick the toilet bowls in the toilet bowl trailer at Coney Island and every time you vomit you have to start over at the beginning, OR eat a cat while it's still alive with nothing to drink.

Toilet bowls. No questions asked. I couldn't eat the
cat even if I did have something to drink.

Poisoned!

I went to a party on Monday night and I ate a hamburger. I felt a little sick during the party but it wasn't bad. When I got home the nightmare began. FOOD POISONING! I puked so many time I started passing out and ending up in weird positions, not knowing how I'd gotten there. Scott took me to the hospital where they IV dripped me so that I could get some water in my system. I couldn't even drink water!
I hate food, I'm never eating again.


Scott took me to Greenpoint. I drank Gatorade and Gingerale through a straw. Sometimes when I'm not sick, I wish I was because it's fun to sleep all day and sip things through a straw and eat a little oatmeal or a cracker. But yesterday it did NOT feel good. My whole body hurt. It was like I had gotten my assed kicked.
Sometimes it's fun to wear your pj's all day and drink tea with a spoon and act like a baby. Just not always.