Tuesday

Well, I guess I really am getting old. Today I had to make an emergency trip to the emergency room at Beth Israel. I had abdominal pains from what I thought was an cyst in my ovary. Turns out, it was a fucking KIDNEY STONE! The doctor prescribed me Flomax and this strainer, which I have to take with me when I pee to catch the lil fucker.

He offered me Vicodin or Percs which I declined—still bummed about that. Oh well, stay tuned for my last Wednesday where the weirdness should continue, I'm sure.
KIDNEY STONED! Only four days left of my twenties. Get me a walker for my birthday.